Date Night – Then and Now

file2731266152771On August 15, 1991, my husband and I went on our first date. This August, we’ll celebrate twenty-one years of marriage. What can I say? The guy took me on some great dates.

He still does, but not nearly as often. And it’s not like he’s dropped the ball. It’s just the reality of time, finances, and kids. So when the opportunity arises, he pulls out the big dogs. But our outings these days are different than those of yore.

Remember how it used to be? Two days before, I’d have planned the outfit. I mean everything – from the jewelry to my pedicure. These days, I think about what I have that will go with shoes that are sexy, yet comfortable. Yeah, it’s a limited choice. The night of, when I’m already an hour behind in my planned beauty prep, I discover nothing fits. This results in me calling off the whole night because, “I’m too gross to go out in public!” Thankfully, my husband, who’s still a charmer, can talk me down from the ledge.

In the old days, we were eager to learn everything about one another. file9221246822250Nothing the man said was boring. Now, over our first cocktail, we’re usually deciding on the appropriate punishment for the latest stunt our kids have pulled. (For you good parents, that would be consequence.) Once we’ve taken care of business, parent roles are pushed aside, and we talk about ourselves. Granted, we don’t always hang on the other’s every word, but on a good date (with a good bottle of wine), we laugh and enjoy one another sans all the junk that can clutter most days.

Back then, when it was time to head home, he’d open my car door and make sure I was comfortable before he shut it. As he headed to his side, I’d adjust my outfit to display my bod to its best advantage. I’d check my compact, looking for any debris in the teeth or nose, and as he opened his door, I’d toss my hair, trying to pull off fun, when in fact, I was going for a quick fluff. Then I was ready. Ready for that kiss that I knew would curl my toes.

But we’re married now. Intimacy has been established. There’s no wondering how our evening will end. On our last date, after he let me in the car (yes, he’s still a gentleman), I rushed to kick off my heels and yank off my Spanx shorts. By the time he got in the car, I’d reclined my seat and planted my feet on the dashboard.

He cocked his head and gave me a sexy smile. “You know we’re in a public parking garage.”

“I don’t care,” I answered, letting out a deep breath. “I’m freakin’ bloated.”

My husband patted my knee and said the words that prove he’s a hero: “I’ll stop and get some Gas X.”

God, I love that man.

Rose photo by mxruben. Cocktail photo by imelenchon.

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13 thoughts on “Date Night – Then and Now

  1. On our first date, Jack took me to the North Florida State Fair. Every time we got in a line, it proved to be the slowest one on the grounds. I made him go on all the rides with me, not knowing that he harbored a deep-seated conviction that there was an essential bolt about to work loose on every one of them. When we got ready to leave we found that his little Fiat had a flat tire. Good thing it was a tiny car, because we had to change the tire by the light of a cigarette lighter. We were together for thirty-three years, until death etc., and I miss him.

  2. Haha! Love your “then & now.” My second date with my husband was a doozie. We were both incredibly shy so we both had a couple of drinks at dinner to loosen up (you know, so we could actually talk to each other). Then we went to a movie. My husband proceeded to fall asleep half way though (thanks to the alcohol) and I sat there for half an hour wondering whether I should wake him up and offer to hold the popcorn or just let him sleep. I honestly thought he’d never call me for another date again! (Oh, but young love is willing to overlook so much!) These days our dates (when we find time to have them) are so much better. We go to coffee shops for dessert, ride the train downtown to our favorite restaurant, or late night bike rides (my fave). Oh…and Happy Anniversary!!

  3. Oh Chris! Thanks for the good morning LAUGHS! I love your descriptions. On our second date, my hubby took me to see a new Star Trek film, knowing that I adored Sci-Fi. BUT I was astounded when he didn’t know the characters! He was out to impress me and I was bowled over that he would want to. The first date doesn’t count because I was literally meeting him for the first time at a TGI Fridays. That was 16 years ago last month. No kiddos to talk over, except for the antics of the menagerie at home, all 9 of them.

  4. Things do change but there’s a comfort that only comes from years together. Loved the post. On Sept. 6 Richard and I will celebrate 33 happy, sad, interesting, exciting, bored . . .years together. Congrats to both you and Kristin for y’all mile stones.

  5. Love this post! Chris, you’re correct that date night changes after parenthood. Now you’re obsessed with sanitizer and moisturizer. Before no one interrupted your evening out with numerous texts, which really mean “When are you coming home?” If you or your spouse suggest a walk or drive in the moonlight, it’s not for a romantic interlude. You just want to stay out long enough for the kids to finish their homework, do their chores, and/or fall asleep before you do.

    Happy Anniversary!-Jillian

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